A Translator's World

A-Kon Pics

Thu, 05 Jun 2008 16:20:34 GMT

So I went to A-Kon last weekend. Dan and I stayed at this great Super 8 Motel by DFW. I thought it would be really shitty because it was less than $60/night and it's a Super 8, but it was really great. The room even had a mini fridge. We went to Traders' Village (bigass fleamarket in Grand Prarie) on Saturday and then to the con on Sunday. I like going on Sunday because it's cheaper, less crowded, and the dealers always have markdowns. It was nice not having to worry about money or work for a whole 48 hours; I think I really needed a vacation. Here's some pics I took:

And here's yours truly (right) and Dan (left):

In other news, I'm working on Romancing Saga 2 right now and have yet to be hit by a bus. It's actually a fun game and the script is fairly easy, despite the pages of control code garbage in it. The game uses control codes in much the same way Ancient Magic does: to determine how your main character speaks based on what type of person you've chosen. I'd like to be able to include this in the English version, but I don't know if it's possible yet. I've also been trying to finish up Nadia: Secret of Blue Water for the Genesis. I originally told KingMike it would only take me a few weeks, and I've ended up working on it for several months. My only excuse is that it's an RPG written entirely in kana, and it's one wordy motherfucker.

I worked on another project for him recently, an action game called Dragon Scroll. The whole script was in hiragana, and the game itself was a piece of crap. Usually I play through each game I translate, but this one was so difficult, boring, and downright fugly graphics-wise that I stopped 5 minutes into it and just did a blind translation. I'm glad other people liked it (KingMike even bought the cartridge w/ instruction manual), but to me it played like Rygar's retarded cousin. To each his own, I guess.

Back from the grave!

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 02:28:58 GMT

It's been about a year since my last post. I felt like I didn't have time for Live Journal for quite awhile, but now I'm back in the saddle again.

Everything's pretty much the same. Still living in Round Rock, still working my phone monkey job (but I did get the promotion mentioned in my previous post). I've started my little scanlation group, Desert Bus. It's basically my fiance and I scanlating two series: Tokimeki Tonight and Boy Alice in Wonderland. It's a long, sometimes boring process, but it gives me a lot of personal satisfaction to know people are reading my work. Also, Black Lagoon was licensed by Viz a couple months ago. I just about started crying when I broke the news to my editor. BL was my favorite project so far, and I had been translating it for two years. I have a whole e/n post about it on the Desert Bus blog, so I really won't get into it here.

One important thing that I still haven't come to terms with: my fiance has come out as a transsexual and started taking hormones. This was a gradual thing, really, as he's wanted the surgery for quite some time. He finally got a contract job at Apple, and can afford doctor bills and a therapist. (Going to a therapist is mandatory to start hormone treatment.) My real problem with this is I don't have anyone to talk to about it. I don't have many non-work acquaintances in real life, and my coworkers are all older, religious, and narrow-minded. (I like them as coworkers, but I would never spend any time with them outside work.) I also haven't told my parents yet; I'm trying to wait until I get more comfortable with it before I blow their minds. My fiance's parents did not take it well: his mother threatened suicide and made him go to a sperm bank to have his guys frozen "in case he ever wants to have children" (when pigs fly). She was pissed when she found out that she can't get access to his sperm without his permission, and that I inherit it in the event of his death. Mwahahaha. No grandbabies for her. :P

These recent events have lead me to two points of self-discovery: I'm bi (I like chicks) and I'm pretty damn masculine. Whenever we went to visit my fiance's parents, I always felt pressured into the submissive wife role even though I wear the pants in the relationship. I think next time we go to Houston I'll regale my in-laws with how I bought my sweetie his (or her) first bra. Revenge is ever so sweet. I've also decided I'm not having a real wedding. I feel marriage is superfluous, and wouldn't even get married if not for the tax breaks. My fiance and I are going down to the courthouse one weekend to get our marriage license. No ceremony, no caterers, no sappy romantic music. I would like to take a week long honeymoon in Napa Valley, with a stop over in San Francisco for some shopping. I'm going to forgo the wedding and enjoy the honeymoon.

I'll try to write more later. I'm going to translate a bit and then cook dinner.

Sat, 27 Jan 2007 08:19:27 GMT

Well, it's been, uh, 6 months since my last post. I'm still at my phone monkey job, although I'm now in a better department and applying for a supervisory position. Still hammering away at Black Lagoon (we're up to Chapter 11!) and about halfway finished with Ancient Magic. I also participated in Al|together 2006 (see previous post), translated a sweet horror game and had a damn good time. In other translator-y news, I'm on the verge of starting my own small manga group, with everything lovingly translated and edited by yours truly. More on that later.

And I'm no longer in Austin proper. About a week ago I moved to Round Rock, which is just north of Austin, to be closer to work. Since then I've been hemorraging money for movers, electric and water deposits, new furnishings, and a two-night hotel stay because we got our power turned on two days late. I feel like I'm literally oozing money, leaving behind a little trail of dollar bills wherever I go. :/

Seeing as how everyone loves customer horror stories, I thought I'd share a few. I work in the repair department, so about 95% of our calls are customers calling about service. Some of the gems I've gotten:

A woman who screamed at me because her tech wasn't coming in the morning. I don't mean bitched and moaned, I mean threw a temper-tantrum screaming fit on my phone. Then she hung up on me.

A man who indignantly asked if our techs carried compressors on their trucks. (They do not.) I calmly explained to him that compressors are large and expensive ($200-$500), so there's no way for a tech to carry it with him. He then demanded the service be provided for free (?) because the tech will have to order the part. I hit mute and had a good laugh.

This was one of the most bizarre calls I ever had (but it makes for a good story). A guy from Dot Com (our online department) calls up with the customer already on the line. He explains that this woman has a water softener that's just a few days out of warranty, and she needs a tech to go out. I pull up her file and see that it's actually a month out of warranty, and verify the purchase date with her. The customer proceeds to tell me that she's had this problem for six months and she's even had a plumber out to her home. I explain that because it's a month out of warranty, there may be a trip fee unless the tech can verify that it's an ongoing problem. At this point she bursts into tears and goes all hysterial over a $55 service fee. I'm expecting Dot Com guy to back me up or at least calm her down, but instead he starts screaming "that's not how we treat the customers" and saying that I don't know how to do my job! At this point I'm embarassed for the both of us. Not only did I have a hysterical customer on my phone, I had a fucktard employee who didn't know his ass from a hole in the ground. Thank God he hung up on me or I would've gotten fired for verbally reaming him.

And more recently there was the guy who thought we were UPS. He calls up because his part had been delivered to the wrong address. He demands that I call UPS and have the delivery man come back out that night. My exact words were, "I'm sorry, Sir. We don't control UPS." He says someone at this line told him we could call and have the part delivered to the correct address. I explain that everything after the part has shipped is up to the customer: I could give him his tracking info and the phone number for UPS, but he has to do the rest. He's so belligerent about it that I finally give in and call National Parts to have his two $300 control panels emergency reordered and shipped to the right address. All because this lazy bastard refused to make a 2 minute phone call to UPS.

Mon, 31 Jul 2006 23:25:55 GMT

I haven't written any new stories, but work is going pretty well. I'm participating in Al|together 2006 this year, and I'm really enjoying it so far. Visual novels are so different from anything else I've ever translated. Eventually I'd like to read/translate novels, so it's good practice.

I'm also going to sign up for the Japanese Language Proficiency Test this year. If I have funds, I'll be flying to New York to take it the first weekend of December. I am kind of nervous, though, because I'll probably be taking the Level 2, and I feel like no matter how much I beef up my Japanese skills, it won't be enough!

Lots of exciting things at work. Our department is doing the manager shuffle, so I'm currently on my 3rd manager. We're also getting some visually impaired (read: blind) sales associates, and a few people are up in arms about the guide dogs the new associates use. One of my coworkers spent 30 minutes in a meeting bitching about how the guide dogs are allowed in the cafeteria. Talk about sensitivity, eh? :P Some of my coworkers are pretty damn weird, frankly, but I do enjoy my little phone monkey job. Hopefully I'll land a sweet job in mechanical parts in a few months so I'll only have to deal with dumbass techs instead of dumbass customers.

monogatari

Mon, 29 May 2006 22:13:28 GMT

Sorry, this story's out for submission to an actual publication, so I've had to take it down. So much for sharing my "literary gift" with the world, eh? ;)

What's next, "Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom Mushroom: The Book"?

Fri, 12 May 2006 03:48:24 GMT

Maddox didn't spend years trying to shop his book to a publisher, a publisher approached him based on the popularity of his Web site. It's a model that's seen in several books this year, such as "Real Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book," by Robert Hamburger (pseudonym). From the CNN.com article

This single statement makes me want to never ever become a published writer. Plz die. Kthnx.

Also, I got a job.

Take This Job and Shove It - Public Version

Thu, 09 Mar 2006 08:00:31 GMT

It's official. The head of my law firm is the Biggest Douche in the Universe. I don't refer to him as my boss because I'd like to think that my boss was the professional, highly experienced paralegal I worked under that the head of the firm drove away with his insane, douche-like behavior. I will henceforth call the head of the firm David, because he is a wealthier, fatter, more popular version of David Brent from the British version of "The Office". Today, the other secretary, my boss, and I staged a revolution of sorts. We all turned in our two week notices this morning, leaving David scampering to find a new staff. At 6:30pm tonight David called the other secretary and I to tell us we were "no longer needed" (read: fired). This is not a problem: my boss already has a new job lined up, I've got an interview at a headhunting agency next week, and the other secretary (a full-time student) is off to London for spring break. This leaves David without any staff whatsoever. What's all the sweeter is that he may get disbarred soon because of his own incompetence, despite trying to force the adverse party, the client, my boss, and even yours truly to take the blame for him. However, this is but the tip of the iceberg.

David is fucking insane. Everybody has their own theory about this. My boss claimed that David is just an asshole, while another coworker suspected that drugs might be involved. And another coworker says that David simply has no leadership ability and deals with stress very poorly. My theory is that David has severe mental problems, the majority of which are caused by stress. I think he has either paranoid schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. The man lives in his own little fantasy world where people are all conspiring against him. He is viciously manipulative, often fabricating conversations with clients or employees that never took place. He is also a pathological liar. David has somehow convinced himself that he had polio as a child and was forced to go to school with an iron lung (his words exactly). This is total bullshit for several reasons, the most obvious being that polio does permanent muscle damage and David does not walk with a limp. He's also convinced himself that he's more or less a doctor (he even has a set of scrubs he wears to the office), when he has, on several occasions, argued medical fallacies (ie: stress does not cause illness).

David is extremely arrogant. He throws a temper tantrum when he has to do basic tasks such as cleaning the kitchen, taking out the garbage, or even finding a phone number. He pretty much talks to everybody like shit and has been extremely rude to our clients. Everything you say to him is "demeaning," everything insults his intelligence, and everything is somehow beneath him. (And when you try explaining this to him, he just looks at you like you grew arms out of your head.) The one time I cursed at him (and technically I cursed to him), I said, "David, you've gotta be shitting me." and he threw a HUGE hissy fit, threatening to fire me if I ever talked to him that way again. So yeah, arrogant and completely incapable of dealing with employees. Really, the worst part about this is that he wants everyone to believe that he's this great humanitarian. You know the type: willing to help out, volunteer and contribute, but a total fucking prick otherwise. He spends more time going to Scout meetings than he does at the office. The voice mail on his cell phone says, "And do something nice for a child today" at the end, to which I always reply before the beep, "Bite me, asshole." David desperately wants to make people think he's this super-important, superior, but nice, caring guy, and it makes me want to vomit.

David refuses to take responsibility for anything. I can't count the number of times he's screwed up and tried to blame it on the staff. My favorite (besides his imminent disbarring) was the time he signed for our W-2 forms and fucking lost them. The delivery guy HAD HIS FUCKING SIGNATURE and he simply wouldn't own up to it. Instead, we had a 20 minute meeting about how to stamp the mail. (David is also the motherfucker who took my date stamp and dicked with it; I spent 10 minutes fixing it and got ink all over my hands because he's too stupid to use a date stamp.)

David is incompetent. David is the head of a law firm and has practiced law for over 25 years. He cannot type, he cannot use a postage machine, he can barely fax, he can't order office supplies, he can't perform the most basic of functions on a phone system, and he can't do anything on a computer but stare at the pretty screensaver. He is very literally the pointy-haired boss from Dilbert.

I took the liberty of covering my own ass before I left. I was in charge of ordering all office supplies, so I made personal copies of all the office supply invoices just in case he later claims that I tried to steal money from him. I don't think he'll do it, but I trust the fat fuck about as far as I can throw him. (Part of me is actually worried that he'll see this post and try to sue for slander or something, even though I didn't use his real name in the public version; he's just that vindictive.) And the motherfucker's going to be hiring some poor unsuspecting college student who's just looking for a decent job. Hopefully he/she will come away with the same lesson I have: if your boss is an arrogant, incompetent cunt who lies constantly, it's time to find another job.

Most Loaded Article EVER

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 17:30:03 GMT

shihtzu linked to a website called Concerned Women for America. Being an ardent lover of Crazy Christian Bullshit, I just had to check it out. This was my favorite article by far:

Two Films: World Views in Collision 1/10/2006
By Lee Duigon

"Narnia" and "Brokeback" reveal the true nature of the Culture War.

It's very rare that our popular culture produces, at the same time, two icons that clearly express diametrically opposed world views. But this winter, that's exactly what we have in the simultaneous release of two major movies. By watching who lines up behind each film, we can discern the order of battle in the Culture War.

Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe expresses a Christian world view--never mind marketing efforts to disavow it. When it opened in December, it dominated the box office.

The homosexual "love" story, Brokeback Mountain, expresses the humanist world view. When it opened the same week as Narnia, it wowed the critics--who virtually anointed it for all the major film awards.

Point by point, we see these two films line up at totally opposite ends of the spectrum, showing the nature of the Culture War in high relief.

1.In Narnia the hero, Aslan, sacrifices himself for a traitor, even as Christ sacrificed Himself for sinners. In Brokeback,the two sods sacrifice others (in this case wives and children) for themselves. In humanism man is always god, and thus entitled to receive sacrifices.

2.In Narnia there is an ultimate authority, a deeper "magic" from "before Time dawned"--this is, God and the will of God. In Brokeback there is no ultimate authority. There is only each individual's personal desires.

3.You can hardly beat Narnia for "diversity." In Aslan's army we find fauns, centaurs, talking animals, and four human children. His enemy, the White Witch, rules an equally diverse mob of every kind of unsightly monster you can imagine. But all this diversity is only on the surface. Below the surface there is a coherent moral order. All of the creatures on Aslan's side have declared their loyalty to a vision of the good, and the Witch's followers have chosen evil. In Brokeback Mountain, the surface is all there is. There is no underlying moral order.

4.Redemption, in Narnia, comes through grace from above: It is the gift of God, unearned and undeserved. But for the characters in Brokeback, there is no higher power and therefore no redemption. The characters are stuck with who they are. There is no escape from it, no appeal to a higher authority, and no grace. One reminds us of hope, the other of despair.

5.We all serve a master, Narnia teaches us--either the Lion or the Witch, good or evil. Those who seek to occupy a safe middle ground are only kidding themselves, because there is no middle ground.

In Brokeback, there being no ultimate good or evil, the characters serve only their personal desires. "Do as thou wilt," was satanist Aleister Crowley's motto. He would have been perfectly at home with this screenplay.

We can be grateful to the movie industry for unintentionally posing this choice so clearly. The opposition of these two films cuts through the confusion and forces us to choose sides. They share no common ground: There's no fence between them that we can sit on. It's almost as if the two production companies colluded to make sure they made movies that are literally poles apart.

Brokeback Mountain reveals the humanist world view for what it is: no grace, no redemption, no higher truth or morality and, in the words of Jean-Paul Sartre, "no exit." We are dust that walks and talks for a little while and then returns to dust. If you don't get yours in the little hour in which you strut and fret your part upon the stage, you don't get it--period.

In the Christian world view, allegorized by Narnia's author, C.S. Lewis, we are created by the same Highest Power Who created the universe, Who redeems us by sacrificing Himself, willingly, in the person of His Son. And to the Son, as to the Lion, He has given all power in heaven and earth. We who belong to Him and believe in Him shall live. But we are free to choose the Witch, and to fall when she falls.

Which of these movies expresses your world view?

Which side are you on?

What's bullshit about this? To start with, the use of the phrase "Culture War" is a big fucking red flag. Second, the flagrant use of quotes by Sartre and Crowley (whom the author incorrectly calls a Satanist) show her blatant distain for the "secular" worldview. So according to the author, there is a Christian worldview and a secular one. That's it. No other religions, no philosophy, just Christian and secular. The irony of this is that Naria is a children's fantasy novel and Brokeback Mountain deals with the adult world in all its joy and sorrow. So according to the author, you can either live in the real world, where mankind is left to figure out things for itself, or a Christian fantasy world of Good and Evil, where the consequences of every action are so obvious that you really have no free will. Seriously, which one of these sounds more realistic? When it comes down to it, I'd rather be a gay cowboy than follow a Goddamn CG lion, thank you very much.

I think this article also explains my contempt for C.S. Lewis. Tolkien (who I don't care for either), at least had characters who were capable of both good and evil, Gollum being the most obvious. Lewis abandons that for a childish, simplistic fantasy where morality itself is never brought into question and other ways of looking at the world are non-existant. I say that if you want a real Christian writer, go read some Graham Greene.

I will leave you with one of my favorite Bill Hicks quotes on the subject of Christianity, "The whole image is that eternal suffering awaits anyone who questions God's infinite love. That's the message we're brought up with, isn't it? Believe or die! 'Thank you, forgiving Lord, for all those options.'"

Gingerbread house!

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 03:37:38 GMT

I finally made my gingerbread house today. I bought one of those kits from the grocery store, so all I had to do was prepare the icing, put the house together, and decorate it. The worst part was that the icing flew everywhere when I was mixing it, so there were thick white ribbons of icing all over my kitchen counter. Ain't that a nice visual? At least I didn't get any in my hair. :P

Here's a picture of the house in all its, uh, glory:

Oh, and this is the source image for my new icon. It's Dr. Nusakan, the Mystic doctor from SaGa Frontier who runs a clinic for the undead. He's a hidden character who will only join your party on two quests. And he's totally hot. Rowr! The doctor is in!

Ah, I can't believe I have to go into work tomorrow. I want to stay home and play video games. Oh well, my last paycheck was freaking huge, so at least I have something to look foward to. And I got some great stuff for Christmas, like the money for a digital camera and a new set of dishes from my in-laws. That's good, too.

I think my pen name should be Richard Upton Pickman...

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 01:13:02 GMT

In the spirit of NaNoWriMo, I revised a story that I wrote a couple months ago. And, in the spirit of having my work mocked by complete strangers, I've decided to post it here in all its glory. :P That reminds me, it might not be such a bad idea to disable anonymous posting.

I'd really like some honest, constructive feedback on this story, as it is the first full, polished short story I've ever written. That being said, I'm not gonna bullshit around. This is a really, really dirty story, and not one of those fluffy happy romance stories. I think I mentioned in one of my early posts that I like to write about sex, and well, here's some damn good proof of that. The gist is that if you're prudish or easily offended, do not read this story. Also, this story is fucking long. It's around 4,300 words, or 6 pages in MS Word, so you might want to take a piss and get a snack before you sit down to read it.

"Cold Day in Spring"

That face--he often saw her face in his dreams. She walked right past him like a specter in her heavy grey winter coat and thick spectacles. He turned and grabbed her arm quickly, dragging her into an alley and throwing her against a wall. No one noticed; it was as if they stood alone, locked in a timeless void. She smelled like musty books and incense, an odd scent, but a pleasant one none the less. Her eyes were so deep and innocent, filled with the striking purity of youth; he knew she was terrified. Her dark grey hair was bound in a tight braid, giving her a rather childish quality. Everyone had grey hair in Criptia; young, old, it made no difference. Her braid looked especially beautiful to him, and in fact, he prized this special kind of beauty in his prey. She opened her mouth to scream, and Leddos instinctively covered her delicate pink lips with his gloved hand. "Quiet. You're coming with me, girl." He growled in his distinctively odd, high-pitched voice. One accidental glimpse of the book in the backpack at her feet made him pause for a moment. It was "Cold Day in Spring," a favorite novel of his. It was South Criptian in origin, and therefore nearly impossible to obtain in North Criptia, which had more or less culturally walled itself off from the rest of the continent. Leddos himself had managed to get ahold of a translated copy via his father, who could get him anything his heart desired. How this lower class girl managed to obtain a copy was beyond him. "You like this book? It's so obscure!" He removed his hand, forgetting his original intentions with the girl and now far more interested in how she procured a copy of such difficult-to-find forbidden literature.
"Please let me go! I'll give you the book! I can get another!" Delicate, slender tears began to stream down the girl's face. Seeing those tears reminded Leddos of his baser urges, urges which needed to be fulfilled immediately: sadly, literature would have to wait.
"Shh! Be quiet! It's not the book I want, girl. I wonder what you look like under that big coat? I'd love to find out!" He went to grab the dirty, scratched-up buttons on her coat, but she managed to clumsily kick him in the shin. It barely hurt, of course, but it did stun him; seeing her chance, she frantically grabbed her backpack and slipped away like a frightened rat. He tried desperately to follow her, but she was quickly swallowed by the throngs of people on the street. Gritting his teeth, Leddos fiercely whispered obscenities into the chilly afternoon air.

Each time he recalled the incident, it became a bit blurrier. The girl's soft, chubby face looked so sweet and innocent; he remembered it with warm fondness, as if she had been a childhood friend, but he constantly reminded himself that his feelings were based on filthy, avaricious lust, not love. Despite this, he would often fantasize about her: sometimes he would hurt her, and yet others they would discuss literature, and, once in a great while, she would even confess her love for him. The last fantasy somewhat bewildered Leddos: he had never thought about any woman in this way. Rather than trying to analyze it, he concerned himself with the fact that he was fantasizing so often about a girl he'd known for a matter of minutes; this especially troubled him because his intention had been only to rape her, nothing more. The book she was carrying must've meant something: Leddos didn't consider himself superstitious in the least, but "Cold Day in Spring" was a favorite of his, and the fact that she had a copy of this rare foreign book struck him as one hell of a coincidence.

The eyes. Those horrible ghastly eyes. Every time she had tried reading "Cold Day in Spring" since encountering that crazy boy who had trapped her in the alley, she couldn't help but see those wild, cruel eyes leering at her with each flip of the page. She could feel her stomach tensing up, twisting itself into rubbery knots; a couple of times she even had to run to the bathroom across the hall and vomit up whatever she had eaten. What's more, she had a difficult time keeping the truth from her parents. She would always tell them she'd that eaten something rotten or that she was stressed out from studying. Telling her parents what actually happened simply was not an option. They would not place the blame on her, of course, but they would pump her for information and wail about how she might be pregnant and keep her under constant vigilance for the rest of her life. The plan had always been for her to marry a well-to-do man when she matured, grow fat with child, and lead the quiet life of a wife and mother. As for sex itself, she didn't quite grasp some of its finer details, even though she was fourteen and already beginning to blossom into womanhood. Her mother had vaguely explained the notion of "love-making" with flowery, euphemistic language. Mother had always warned her against letting any boys touch her "private spot," but she could only puzzle over what that meant. Occasionally she would bolt awake at night, drenched in a cold sweat, shaking uncontrollably. When she relived the incident in her dreams, she could never escape from her assailant. "Stop!" She would howl at the top of her lungs, struggling as the boy pulled her second-hand skirt above her hips. He would always respond in that otherworldly voice,
"No. You need to feel this." She screamed so loud during these nightmares that she woke her parents. After her mother calmed her down and returned to bed, she would lay awake for some time pondering the same questions over and over. Why had this happened? Was it her fault? What would he have done to her?

It was, in fact, a fairly cool spring day when the young girl took the stairs to the room number printed on the tiny scrap of paper. At fifteen, the legal age of maturity, her parents had allowed her to work as a delivery girl for their family-owned bookshop. Although she made no money from the job due to her family's recent bout with poverty, she did enjoy the freedom of walking the city streets completing her deliveries, a luxury denied to most girls her age. The majority of her peers weren't allowed out of the house alone; her parents were from West Criptia, however, and were not so strict. She lamented that she hadn't a bicycle to make deliveries go faster, but her family could not afford one. Still, she had her freedom, and that was most important of all. As she trotted up the stairs in her worn-out brown work shoes and bright blue sun dress, she paused for a moment and wondered why someone who lived in a military dormitory would order a medical textbook from a private bookshop instead of the local government one. It was simply none of her concern, she finally concluded, knocking on the door to Room 305. The boy who opened the door, presumably the one who had placed the order, seemed friendly enough; he had big, calm brown eyes and baby fat still on his cheeks. She did not think twice about accepting his cheerful invitation to come inside while he got the money together. As soon as she stepped into the small kitchen, she heard that hateful, high-pitched voice again. "My, my, look how you've grown!" Just then, the *clunk* *clack* of the door closing and locking assaulted her ears as well as her dormant survival instincts: she was trapped, and this time there was no escape. She could feel his malicious presence in the air like a cloud of thick, suffocating smoke as he came up behind her and grabbed her waist with one powerful arm, quickly covering her mouth with his free, hand. She had felt his urgent, strangling grasp once before, and she had prayed she'd never have to feel it again; she noticed that this time he wasn't wearing gloves.
"Hey, Cayben, help me get her ugly dress off, would ya?" The one behind her commanded his pudgy-faced friend. The boy called Cayben grinned happily, as if this request were completely normal.
"Sure." He agreed, standing in front of her, looking most complacent. Her captor dragged her over to the white circular table that decorated the sparse dining room, picked her up without allowing her to struggle whatsoever, and slammed her on the table. Now she was on her back facing him: he looked a bit older, with that same long white hair and evil grin. She could tell just by looking at him that there was something strange about him. His mouth was neither curved in a grin nor a frown; his expression seemed almost mechanical, as if he could not afford to relinquish an ounce of self-control. His hair was parted in the middle, with only a hint of bangs in the front. He had obviously prepared for her arrival. He wore the kind of clothes a young man his age might wear on a date, a nice dress shirt and a pair of slacks, and he smelled faintly of lavender, a rather peculiar scent for a man. The very sight of his cruel emerald eyes made her nauseous. His smiling friend stood behind her, grabbing her wrists firmly, but with a gentler grip and sliding a hand over her lips. First, the green-eyed boy carefully pulled her dirty shoes and socks off, discarding them on the floor. Then he slowly, almost lovingly unbuttoned her dress, carefully watching her reaction as each button came undone. She tried in vain to scream for help. Her dress slid off quite easily, leaving only a thin blue slip to hide her body; Cayben tried to remove her glasses, but her captor told him to stop, saying that they made his victim look even more beautiful.

Leddos caressed the silken material that her flimsy, see-through slip was made of. He placed his hand over her throat, holding her down, while he used his other hand to trace the hem of her skirt, running his slender, oddly feminine fingers up and down her curves. She was quite a unique young lady: her body was a bit disproportionate, with small breasts and thick, flared hips, and her legs seemed a bit chubby, but to him this made her all the more attractive. Cayben had left a few minutes prior to this at Leddos's blunt demand for privacy. The boy had then turned his attention to his prey, explaining that she could scream all she liked, but no one would come to her rescue. "I'm a Torturer here, you see, and sometimes I like to, ahem, deal with my female prisoners in the comfort of my own apartment." The laugh that followed his statement caused an unbearable chill to rush up her spine. "Ah, I never got to introduce myself. I am Leddos Guerra, son of Luura Guerra, Head Torturer of the East Complex. What's your name, hmm?"
"Luura Guerra?!" She gasped, blinking in disbelief. She knew that Luura Guerra was one of the Chiefs of Staff of the military, and a very powerful man. She couldn't believe that this cruel, deranged boy was really his son.
"So you know of my father? Most people around here couldn't care less about my lineage. Strange, yes? Then again, it is kind of refreshing." Leddos smirked, lifting her up and carrying her into his dark bedroom. She hung limp and lifeless like a rag doll, both terrified and unsure of what would come next.

She stared up at the ceiling, lying on his soft featherbed as he dug through one of the drawers of the large dresser which sat on the other side of the room. Naturally, he had locked the door. He wanted no disturbances whatsoever while he played with his victim. Paralyzed with fear and unable to think of a way out, she panicked and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Are you going to kill me when you're finished?" The girl asked curiously, as if she were a child asking where babies come from. Leddos jerked his head around, furrowing his brow, a genuinely astounded expression on his face.
"Why would you ask me such a question? And anyway, shouldn't you be begging for mercy or at least trying to escape?" He nodded his head in the direction of the locked door.
"Well, in the books I've read, the villain never harms the heroine. He certainly never kills her." Her tone was so innocent, so serious that he burst into loud, mocking peals of laughter.
"This isn't a damn novel. I'm going to rape you, and you're going to scream for me. Forget your romantic notions. This is real life, girl." And then, something snapped inside her mind. In a flash of courage it dawned upon her that she mustn't allow him to torment her, to bully her into submission. Who was he to use her to sate his awful desires and cast her away like a leathery husk?
"I won't scream for you, you monster." The words flew from her mouth before she even realized exactly what they were.
"Oh, I think you will. I'm a Torturer, so this is my area of expertise." An arrogant smile crept its way across his lips; her defiance hadn't fazed him in the slightest. And then it occurred to her what he had taken out of the drawer: she noticed a whip, candles, rope, and some other things she couldn't quite make out.
"B-but I thought you were just going to force me!" She cried out, reverting back into the sniveling child she had been just seconds before. The books made it all seem so nice and clean: the villain took the vulnerable girl and then she escaped, only to come back later and exact her revenge. She never thought "love-making" could carry with it such abject cruelty as this.
"I plan to enjoy myself fully with you." The drawer closed with a hollow *thunk*. Overcome by instinct once more, the girl bolted upright and slid off the large bed, backing against the locked door. She panted heavily, her heart racing: she had to get out. The Torturer came closer to her now, unbuttoning his shirt and throwing it on the floor. Even in her panicked frenzy, she couldn't help but stare at his pale but surprisingly muscular torso, as this was the only shirtless man she'd ever seen. Blushing and mortified, the young girl averted her eyes from his chest out of sheer embarrassment, but he stood face to face with her and grabbed her chin, forcing her to look into his emerald eyes. "Fight me all you like. I don't tire easily, and really, it'll just make things more fun." Leddos gently stroked her left cheek. "You really think that romance crap is real?" He shouted in her face, a kind of spiteful, outraged tone dancing on his tongue. She responded with silence. "Come on, I want an answer!" Leddos shook her violently, making her small, perky breasts jiggle underneath her slip. At that moment, the girl glared at him with an intense hatred burning in her eyes, refusing to play along and satisfy him with a response. This wicked boy has tormented me in my sleep for two years. He has made it so that I cannot think of "love-making" without feeling nauseous. I won't be afraid. I won't let him win. She thought, a streak of bravery welling up within her again, her lips shut tight. "You look so angry. And just a minute ago you were cheerfully waiting for me to rape you. You're such a tease." Leddos chided her, looking her in the eye as he stroked her face with his slender fingers.

The pink wax seared and stung as it slid down her fair skin. The Torturer had felt he would need total access to her body to truly enjoy himself, so instead of using his bed, he had chained her to the ceiling after savagely tearing off her slip. She resisted as best she could, but he was incredibly strong despite having such a slight frame. He dribbled wax on her with great care, letting it roll down her breasts and back accompanied by numerous beads of sweat. The worst part was that he refused to stop talking. He taunted her viciously and told her intimate details regarding his profession that made her blood run cold, no doubt trying to frighten her into submission. "This is one of my favorites. The aesthetic of a nude girl with wax adorning her body is quite pleasing to me." He mused, pouring a bit on her stomach. She wanted so badly to cry out in pain, but she forced herself to stay quiet by sheer willpower, suppressing a series of moans and wails as her body was slowly singed with wax.

"Marvelous! I can't believe you've stayed silent this long! And I thought you would sing like a bird once I started whipping you! You certainly have a will of steel!" He wore a smile of pure devilish delight on his face, pleased that one of his victims had actually gone this long without howling in pain or screaming for mercy. "There are so many things I want to do to you!" He clasped his soft, delicate hands together, and she found she could take no more of his perversion.
"You sick freak!" She hissed, angry that he was having fun despite her best efforts to deprive him of any pleasure he might receive from torture.
"And I was really starting to enjoy myself. You know, I've been going easy on you because you're cute and you're so much fun to play with." The Torturer frowned at her, truly insulted by her careless remark. Exasperated and sore, she cried, "I'm not a toy!"
"Of course you are, girl. And I intend to break you." He resumed his arrogant smile.

The girl's screams echoed through the dark, empty apartment. Leddos was surprised that she'd lasted this long, but now the real fun would begin. He had broken her, and she would submit easily. After her rude, inappropriate outburst, he had no qualms about subjecting her to much harsher things than he had originally planned. She had at long last broken her vow of silence when he used the slender handle of the whip to make a woman out of her. He had tried several times to get it between her thick, curvy thighs, but she had kicked wildly at him until he bound her ankles with the rope he had retrieved from his drawer. "You know, if you hadn't called me such a vulgar name, I would've been a bit more gentle. You should be nice to me. I could make things very tough for you." She panted and moaned, sweat pouring down her pained face, too exhausted to fight anymore.
"Take it out, please. It really hurts." She whispered. Leddos's ears picked up her plea immediately. He stared at her stoically and refused. "Please, I-I'll do whatever you want! It hurts!" Those fateful words escaped her lips, making him grin in calm satisfaction. Those were just the words he had been waiting to hear. He decided he would play with her a little more before getting serious.
"You know something, girl, I think you're in love with me. How about confessing your feelings?" His green eyes flashed with that familiar glint of cruelty.
"What?! I hate you!" She hollered, angry and confused.
"Oh, I don't think so. I think you're going to confess your love for me." Leddos said as he ran his fingers through her silky, damp hair. She smelled like sweat and wax and blood and fear, a truly intoxicating scent.
"I-I love you...Le-Leddos..." The words flew out of her mouth in a jumble; just saying them gave her a queasy feeling in the pit of her stomach, like she needed to vomit. He put his hand over his mouth, suppressing yet another grin, pretending to be shocked by her confession.
"Oh, you do? And why is that? Am I like one of the characters in those romance novels you like so much?" He could no longer feign seriousness; his grin kept getting wider and wider.
"Y-yes, you are! You're so...handsome and...and masculine!" His victim cried in desperation, trying frantically to guess what he wanted to hear.
"You think so? How sweet of you. Unfortunately, I'm, shall I say, married to my work. But I see no harm in showing you a good time." He unchained her wrists and picked her up again, laying her on his bed. His arms were a little sore from all the whipping he had done, but it didn't bother him too much; seeing her limp body sprawled out on his bed quickly made the pain vanish, replacing it with familiar lust. She realized very quickly what was going to happen next, as he finally pulled the whip out.
"No..." Her cry of protest was barely audible.
"Ssh. You need to feel this. A young girl like you needs to experience sex at least once." He echoed the words from her nightmare, unbuttoning his expensive dress pants.

Her first experience was undoubtedly not a pleasant one. Leddos was forceful and unrelenting, ignoring her cries and showing absolutely no compassion for a virgin who had only experienced sex on paper. She begged him to be gentle, to let her rest, to slow down, but he would do none of these. When he was done with her, he let her rest, stumbling into the adjacent bathroom for a shower. As she lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling yet again, her hand brushed over her thighs and "private spot." She suddenly thought of her parents, of all things. What would they think? If she survived the night with this ghoulish Torturer, what then? What would become of her?

Stepping out of the steam-cloaked shower, Leddos toweled himself off, vigorously drying his sopping wet hair. It glistened like a sheet of silver when wet, though it was almost white when dry. He put his underwear on, a comfortable pair of silk boxers he had gotten for his birthday, and began brushing out his hair. It felt refreshing to rid himself of all the sweat his skin had accumulated while he played with his victim. The boy studied himself in the mirror, wiping away some of the condensation from its blurry surface. He was, he knew, extremely feminine-looking. The girl's compliment about his masculinity was a lie, pure and simple. The ideal North Criptian male had a pointy, chiseled jaw, hair the texture of hay, and big ropy muscles. His own face was delicate and slender with a soft chin: women despised this kind of face. They wanted a man built like a brick who would fuck them hard and leave them with child. Leddos was strong, but deceptively so: his frame was small and his body lanky. He smirked at his reflection, muttering to himself, "Masculine, am I? I'll fuck her real hard." Then, abruptly, he ventured back into the bedroom.

She emitted a soft groan as her captor sat down next to her on his bed. Glancing over at him, she noticed a change in both his appearance and mood. He seemed to have calmed down a bit, and lacked that crazed, violent look in his eyes that had made her feel physically ill. His hair was wet and the smell of sweat that had lingered on him had now been replaced with the faint fragrance of lavender. "I've been thinking it over, and you must be somewhat educated to have read 'Cold Day in Spring.' How'd you learn how to read?" Leddos eyed her curiously. This question had bothered him for quite some time, but he hadn't thought to bring it up until now. Most North Criptian women could barely read; education was simply not part of their lot in life. The girl gave him a strange look, remembering his interest in the book on that fateful day long ago. Why is this perverted, cruel boy so concerned with literature? She wondered.
"My parents are from West Criptia. They insisted that I learn how to read so I could educate my children."
"Educate your children, huh? Hmm." Those West Criptians. I'll never understand their damn obsession with families. Still, it's a pity her education will go to waste. He thought to himself, rolling his eyes. His fingers slowly found their way into her hair again. She had the softest hair he'd ever touched, and he could see by the look of dread on her face that touching it made her very uncomfortable.

He killed her a few hours later, but he tried to make her last as long as possible. As he sat beside her fresh corpse, he fondly recalled lying on top of her and thrusting away while she squirmed helpless beneath him. Leddos sighed remorsefully, wishing she had lasted even longer. She was so strikingly beautiful and so very, very weak. He wished he could've kept her for at least a day or two, but alas, his violent urges had gotten the better of him after all. In a few hours he would call the sanitation crew and have them dispose of the body and launder the sheets. They were used to getting calls like this from him, the resident Torturer. He went to take another shower to get rid of the unpleasant odor of sweat once and for all. A peculiar thought struck him all of a sudden. He paused for a second, looking at the girl he had just murdered, and realized he didn't even know her name.

Work

Sat, 05 Nov 2005 19:56:02 GMT

Americans like to rip people off

God, that's so depressing. The treatment of workers in this country (illegal or otherwise) has pissed me off for a long time. Some of the things that companies do to avoid paying workers are absolutely criminal, yet such practices are intrinsic to capitalism. What's more, both big and small companies get away with this shit all the time. When it comes to workers' rights, I tend to lean more toward socialism as opposed to Laissez-Faire Capitalism. Also, this is a good example of why immigrating illegally is not such a good idea. You have no rights and no job security of any kind. Granted, legal citizens can have the same problems, but as an illegal immigrant you're much, much more likely to get screwed over. Still, if someone wants to live in this country badly enough, I say go for it. America may be the land of opportunity, but if you're not careful, you may just get more than you bargained for.

Speaking of opportunities, I finally got a job! Starting Monday I'll be working at a small law firm downtown as a part-time office assistant. I went in for the interview on Friday and the lady just gave me the job without even looking at my resume. I make $8/hour and I don't have to wear freaking pantyhose and a dress every day. Whoo-hoo! I'm celebrating by going over to Whole Foods to pick up some Italian Soda and Soy Milk, then going to see "Capote" tomorrow. :)

Random update

Wed, 19 Oct 2005 22:11:49 GMT

It's my birthday today! I'm 23! I can (still) buy porn and alcohol! Yay!

Man, so much stuff has happened over the last few days. Where should I start? First of all, Dan's dad had a quintuple bypass (ie: massive heart surgery) last Wednesday. He's doing fine; Dan's going to visit him this weekend. It's really scary because it makes me think of getting older and having a myriad of health problems. That, and I had to stay in a hospital for a few hours. I hate hospitals. They're full of sick people and sinister-looking medical equipment. At least the food at the cafeteria was decent, I guess.

On Friday morning, I was awoken at 7:30am by a loud "COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO!!!" At first I thought I was dreaming (or just batshit insane), but I kept hearing it. I went out outside, and what did I see on my neighbor's porch? A fucking rooster! A big fat rooster with white feathers! Squawking and wobbling around eating seed. Needless to say, I called the office right away. I haven't heard or seen the rooster again, so I can only assume that the neighbors have killed and eaten it. So much for keeping farm animals in an apartment.

My fiance and I celebrated my birthday last Saturday. We went to see "A History of Violence," which was incredibly good. I won't spoil it, but the ending is very anti-climactic and sad. I think the director demands a lot from his audience, though: namely a conscious effort to look beyond the shocking brutality of violence and instead question its nature. I also rented "North by Northwest," which was also excellent. I haven't seen too many of Hitchcock's films, except for "Psycho" and part of "The Birds," but I admire his ability to create a believable spy movie.

One of my pet rats, Pimiko, is constipated. Her abdomen is a little swollen, and she just isn't pooping. I was really worried at first because I thought it might be the dreaded Megacolon (or Megaweapon, as I kept accidentally calling it). After some research, though, I found out that Megacolon only hits very young rats; older rats usually get a little constipated if you're feeding them a harsh diet. Of course, now I feel bad for feeding her some of my Gazpacho soup. :( There is a solution, however. I just have to regularly feed her fruit that contains a lot of water. So now she's on a diet of lab blocks, oatmeal, and canned fruit. Poor elderly rattie.

I'm so happy summer's almost over. It's getting cooler here in Texas (mid 80s during the day). This means no more $90 electricity bills. I can actually leave the window open during the day without the apartment heating up like a pressure cooker. :)

Sex-type thing / Fun Bill Hicks quotes

Sat, 08 Oct 2005 00:11:16 GMT

So a few days ago, I was giving my fiance a handjob, and he just WOULD NOT freaking come. I kept using more and more lubricant and almost got a cramp in my hand. I know sex is supposed to be a little painful, but I'll pass on the Carpal Tunnel, thanks. Anyway, after he finally came, he kept complaining about how sore his penis was for the next day or so. Luckily, my hand stopped hurting after a few minutes. Maybe I should've offered him an ice pack or something? ;)

Well, I don't have anything interesting to say at the moment, so here's a bunch of fun Bill Hicks quotes. I wish I could've seen him live before he died. :( May he rest in peace.

See, I think drugs have done some good things for us. I really do. And If you don't believe drugs have done good things for us, do me a favor. Go home tonight and take all your albums, all your tapes and all your CDs and burn them. 'Cause you know all those musicians who made all that great music that's enhanced your lives throughout the years? RRRRRRRRRRRREAL fucking high on drugs... The Beatles were so fucking high they let Ringo sing a few songs.

And remember, it's not a war on drugs, it's a war on personal freedom.

Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.

I was in Nashville, Tennesee last year. After the show I went to a Waffle House. I'm not proud of it, I was hungry. And I'm alone, I'm eating and I'm reading a book, right? Waitress walks over to me: "*Smack smack smack smack* Hey, whatchoo readin' for?" Isn't that the weirdest fucking question you've ever heard? Not what am I reading, but what am I reading *for*? Well, Godammit, ya stumped me! Why do I read? Well... hmmm... I dunno... I guess I read for a lot of reasons, and the main one is so I don't end up being a fucking waffle waitress.

You ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really unevolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. "I believe God created me in one day." Yeah, looks liked He rushed it.

One of my big fears in life is that I'm gonna die and my parents are going to come to clean out my apartment and find that porno wing I've been adding on to for years.

The Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts, that's their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm... Sounds like...every commercial on television, doesn't it? You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial? I'm not thinking of gum.

Long-ass survey

Tue, 20 Sep 2005 11:14:03 GMT

This freaking long survey shamelessly ganked from yoshie66. Enjoy.

[ .01. ] First name: Amanda
[ .02. ] Middle name: --
[ .03. ] Last name: --
[ .04. ] Nicknames: Eien Ni Hen, Janis Akuma, A-chan
[ .05. ] Gender: Female
[ .06. ] Birthday: 10/19/82
[ .07. ] Height: 4'11
[ .08. ] Hair colour: Dark brown
[ .09. ] Eye colour: Brown
[ .010. ] Do you wear glasses or contacts: Glasses (I can't see for shit)
[ .011. ] Do you have braces: Yup; all through Jr. High. I even had headgear, and now I have a permanent retainer (bottom) and a plastic retainer (top).

FREEDOM!
[ .012. ] Hair long or short: Long. Real long.
[ .013. ] Where were you born: Houston, Texas.
[ .014. ] Current location: Austin, Texas. (I haven't even left the state. -.-)
[ .015. ] Zodiac sign: Libra
[ .016. ] How many languages do you know: English, Japanese, "Conversational" French
[ .017. ] What language do you want to learn: Chinese, maybe Italian
[ .018. ] Bad habits: Not wearing a bra, being messy, avoiding doing dishes like the plague
[ .019. ] Piercing you have: Ears
[ .020. ] Piercing you want: None
[ .021. ] Tattoos you have: None
[ .021. ] Strangest thing you own: A portrait of Steve Perry as Robocop
[ .023. ] Today: Tuesday
[ .024. ] Today's date: September 20, 2005
[ .025. ] The time: 3:45 am
[ .026. ] Ready for a bunch more questions: Sure.

F A M i L Y
[ .027. ] Mother's name: --
[ .028. ] Father's name: --
[ .029. ] Brother's name: --
[ .030. ] Sister's name: --
[ .031. ] Favourite aunt: --
[ .032. ] Favourite uncle: --
[ .033. ] Favourite grandparent: --
[ .037. ] Best relative: None in particular
[ .038. ] Do you get along with your parents: Yeah, pretty much.
[ .039. ] Does anyone in your family understand you?: Hell no.

P E T S
[ .040. ] Do you have any pets: 4
[ .041. ] What are their names: Gypsy and Cinnamon, Ranze and Pimiko
[ .042. ] What kind of animals are they: Two cats and two rats.

S C H 0 0 L
[ .043. ] Are you still in school: No (thank God).
[ .044. ] Did you drop out: No.
[ .045. ] Current gpa: 3.2
[ .046. ] Favourite grade: They were all pretty much the same.
[ .047. ] Least favourite: See above answer.
[ .048. ] Favourite teacher: Professor Traphagan
[ .049. ] Least favourite teacher: That bitch teacher I took US History with over the summer (don't remember her name).
[ .050. ] Favourite subject: Japanese, 2nd is History
[ .051. ] Least favourite subject: Math (I survived Calculus, though)
[ .052. ] Do/did you buy lunch or bring it: Brought it through most of grade school. The cafeteria food was fuckin' nasty.
[ .053. ] Play any sports on the school's team: Me? Sports? No.
[ .054. ] Do/did you do any extracurricular activities: Chess club.
[ .055. ] Are/were you popular: Nope. No surprise there.
[ .056. ] Favourite dance: Never went to a school dance.
[ .057. ] Favourite memory: Sitting at lunch in "the Pit" with my friends. And being able to leave early senior year because I was in dual credit (college) classes.
[ .058. ] Favourite memory you want to have: Skipping graduation ceremony to play D&D with my friends. My mom refused to let me, and I had to sit through said boring ceremony.
[ .059. ] Least favourite memory: The time I threw up in art class. Long story. :/

F A V 0 R i T E S
[ .061. ] Number: 32
[ .062. ] Letter: Don't have one.
[ .063. ] Shoes: The boots I bought at Thrifttown for $5.00. Or maybe the cheap tennis shoes I play DDR in.
[ .064. ] Saying(s): "I'd never join any club that would accept me as a member.", "I'm going to Hell for that.", "Knock it off or I'll shave both you cats!", "Religion is just an excuse for people to be extremely crappy to eachother."
[ .066. ] Sport: Hockey, sometimes baseball.
[ .067. ] Vegetable: Corn
[ .068. ] Fruit: Stawberry
[ .069. ] Movie: A Clockwork Orange
[ .070. ] Magazine: Don't read any magazines.
[ .071. ] Actor: Clancy Brown, Ralph Fiennes, Brad Dourif (seasoned B-actor)
[ .072. ] Actress: Judy Dench, Kathy Bates, Audrey Hepburn
[ .073. ] Candy: Twizzlers, Gummi Bears, Mike & Ikes, any type of Japanese gummi
[ .074. ] Gum: Not a big gum person.
[ .075. ] Scent: Strawberry, vanilla, lavendar, jasmine for incense; champagne & cassis for bath stuff.
[ .076. ] Candy bar: Mr.Goodbar or Milky Way. I like Paydays, too.
[ .077. ] Ice cream flavour: Cookies and Cream
[ .078. ] Colour: Black and purple
[ .079. ] Season: Fall (there is no winter in Texas)
[ .080. ] Holiday: Christmas
[ .081. ] Band: Argh, there's too many. Maybe Rush.
[ .082. ] Singer: Rob Halford (much love to Freddie Mercury, though)
[ .083. ] Group: Isn't that the same as 81?
[ .084. ] Rapper: Dr.Dre
[ .085. ] Test?: Uh...this quiz?
[ .086. ] Thing in your room: My laptop
[ .087. ] Place to be: On my couch playing video games.
[ .089. ] Tv channel: If I had cable, probably Comedy Central or Cartoon Network
[ .090. ] Junk food: Pastries
[ .091. ] Overall food: Shrimp tempura, fried squid, enchiladas, linguine, Gazpacho soup, etc.
[ .092. ] Store: Thrifttown (cheap stuff), Asahi Imports, Walmart (general cheapness), Whole Foods
[ .093. ] Hangout: Le Fun Arcade by campus, Walmart at 2am, Half Price Books
[ .094. ] Fast food: Probably Zen, a local "Japanese" fast-food place.
[ .095. ] Restaurant: Johnny Carino's (Italian), Joe's Crab Shack (seafood), Kyoto (Japanese)
[ .096. ] Shape: None.
[ .097. ] Time of day: Dead of night. I am a serious nightowl.
[ .098. ] Country: Um, America, I guess, and maybe Japan.
[ .099. ] State: Texas
[ .100. ] Boys name: Vincent
[ .101. ] Girls name: Don't have one.
[ .102. ] Mall: Barton Springs, although I really only go there to look around at the overpriced stuff and sit in the massage chairs at Brookstone Brothers.
[ .103. ] Video game: The Adventures of Lolo games (NES); Tetris (Gameboy); Final Fantasy 6, Chrono Trigger, Secret of Mana, Fire Emblem 3 (SNES); SaGa Frontier, Final Fantasy 7, and Star Ocean 2 (PSX).
[ .104. ] Shampoo: Herbal Essences and Pantene Pro V Dandruff
[ .105. ] Board game: Monopoly, Risk, Trivial Pursuit
[ .106. ] Computer game: The 7th Guest
[ .107. ] Car: None really
[ .108. ] Music video: Spinal Tap's "The Majesty of Rock," Weird Al's "Amish Paradise"
[ .109. ] Swear word: Motherfucker
[ .110. ] Word: Salsa
[ .111. ] Month: October
[ .112. ] Cartoon character: Lupin the 3rd
[ .113. ] Scary movie: Silence of the Lambs
[ .114. ] Team: *Shrugs*
[ .115. ] Possession: My Windstone dragons. I've had them forever.

WHATS THE FiRST THiNG Y0U TH0UGHT 0F WHEN Y0U HEAR..
[ .116. ] eminem: white
[ .117. ] dog: bark
[ .118. ] hot: Texas
[ .119. ] britney spears: ugly
[ .120. ] nsync: barf
[ .121. ] real world: MTV
[ .122. ] orange: apple
[ .123. ] choice: pro
[ .124. ] fuck: off
[ .125. ] bisexual: bi-curious
[ .126. ] black: cat
[ .127. ] icq: eh
[ .128. ] insane clown posse: Fago
[ .129. ] linkin park: whiny
[ .130. ] jack: in the box
[ .131. ] rainbow: gay
[ .133. ] cucumber: rats
[ .134. ] shark: steaks
[ .135. ] lifehouse: ick
[ .136. ] bat: cute
[ .137. ] leather: S&M
[ .138. ] whip: sex
[ .139. ] america: nationalism
[ .140. ] water: pee
[ .141. ] volcano: Hawaii

THIS OR THAT
[ .142. ] Rock or rap: rock
[ .143. ] Rock or pop: rock
[ .144. ] Rock or r&b: rock
[ .145. ] Rock or metal: metal
[ .146. ] Rap or pop: pop
[ .147. ] Rap or r&b: rap
[ .148. ] Rap or metal: metal
[ .149. ] Pop or r&b: pop
[ .150. ] Pop or metal: metal
[ .151. ] R&b or metal: metal
[ .152. ] Linkin park or limp bizkit: Don't like either
[ .153. ] Tool or korn: Tool
[ .154. ] Selena or jennifer lopez: Selena
[ .155. ] Hot or cold: either
[ .156. ] Winter or summer: Winter
[ .157. ] Spring or fall: Fall
[ .158. ] Shakira or britney: Shakira
[ .159. ] Icp or eminem: I'll have to go with ICP
[ .160. ] Marilyn manson or rob zombie: Rob Zombie
[ .161. ] Kittie or garbage: Garbage
[ .162. ] Mtv or vh1: VH1
[ .163. ] Buffy or angel: Neither
[ .164. ] Dawson's creek or gilmore girls: I hate both of them
[ .165. ] Football or basketball: Basketball
[ .166. ] Summer olympics or winter olympics: Neither
[ .167. ] Skiing or snowboarding: Snowboarding
[ .168. ] Rollerblading or skateboarding: Skateboarding
[ .169. ] Black or white: Black
[ .170. ] Orange or red: Red
[ .171. ] Yellow or green: Either
[ .172. ] Purple or pink: Purple
[ .173. ] Slipknot or mudvayne: Slipknot
[ .174. ] Hot topic or pac sun: Neither
[ .175. ] Inside or outside: Inside
[ .176. ] Weed or alcohol: Alcohol, preferably daquiris or mudslides
[ .177. ] Cellphone or pager: Cellphone
[ .178. ] Pen or pencil: Pencil
[ .179. ] Powerpuff girls or charlie's angels: Both suck
[ .180. ] Scooby doo or dino: Scooby Doo
[ .181. ] Dragon ball z or pokemon: No thanks
[ .182. ] Star wars or star trek: Star Trek
[ .183. ] Tattoos or piercings: Neither
[ .184. ] Prep or punk: Punk
[ .185. ] Slut or whore: Who cares?

P R i V A T E L i F E
[ .186. ] Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend: I'm engaged
[ .187. ] Do you have a crush: Not at the moment
[ .188. ] Do you love anyone right now: *Waves engagement ring around)
[ .189. ] Have you ever been in love: Yes
[ .190. ] How many people have you liked: A few
[ .191. ] Who was your first crush: Seriously, I don't remember
[ .192. ] How many hearts of have you broken: None, I don't think
[ .193. ] How many people broke your heart: None
[ .194. ] Best quote to sum up love: "Love is a dog from Hell" (Charles Bukowski)
[ .195. ] So what is he/she like: Gentle, sweet, caring, very tall, great in bed
[ .196. ] Do you have a picture of him/her: Tons of them
[ .197. ] Please post it if you do: Here's one
[ .198. ] Do you have a picture of yourself: Yeah
[ .199. ] Please post it if you do: It's on my info page
[ .200. ] Do you go by looks or personality: I like personality, but looks are important, too.
[ .201. ] Ever kiss a friend: No
[ .202. ] Are you still friends: I guess
[ .203. ] So moving along. do you smoke: No
[ .204. ] Do you smoke weed: Nope. I think it should be legalized, it's just not for me.
[ .205. ] Ever trip on acid: No
[ .206. ] How about a little x: Nope
[ .207. ] Crack, heroin, anything else: I got high off of model glue on accident once.
[ .208. ] Beer good or beer bad: I like Corona and Heineken.
[ .209. ] Are you the sissy who drinks wine coolers: Yep. I love my Bartles & James.
[ .210. ] Do you like Smirnoff ice: Nope
[ .211. ] Prefer beer or liquor: Liquor
[ .212. ] What kind of cigarettes do you smoke: I've never smoked.
[ .213. ] Have you ever drank Hpnotiq: No, whatever the hell that is.
[ .214. ] If yes, when was the last time you got some: Never

W 0 U L D Y 0 U EVER..
[ .215. ] Bungee jump: No
[ .216. ] Sky dive: No (I'd probably puke in mid-air)
[ .217. ] Swim with dolphins: No. I don't like dolphins.
[ .218. ] Scuba dive: Maybe
[ .219. ] Go rock climbing: Maybe
[ .220. ] Eat shit for $1,000,000: Hell no
[ .221. ] Turn your back on your friends for personal gain: No
[ .222. ] Steal a friend's boyfriend/girlfriend: No
[ .223. ] Cross-dress: Sure. I've done it before.
[ .224. ] Lie to the police: Yeah, depending on the situation.
[ .225. ] Run from the police: Maybe
[ .226. ] Lie to your parents: Yeah
[ .227. ] Walk up to a stranger and kiss them: No way
[ .228. ] Be an exotic dancer: I don't think so
[ .229. ] Walk out of a restaurant without paying: If I could get away with it
[ .230. ] Streak: Maybe

HAVE Y0U EVER?
[ .231. ] Flashed someone: No
[ .232. ] Told a person how you felt bout them: Yeah
[ .233. ] Been to michigan: No
[ .234. ] Gone to jail or juvi: No
[ .235. ] Skateboarded: No
[ .236. ] Skinny dipped: No
[ .237. ] Stolen anything: I can't remember, probably.
[ .238. ] Wanted to kick my ass for making this so long: Yoshie and I will gang up on you. :P
[ .239. ] Kicked someone's ass: Yeah
[ .240. ] Pegged someone in the head with a snowball: Nope. There's no snow in Texas.
[ .241. ] Broke a beer bottle: No
[ .242. ] Gotten into a bar, under-aged: No, but I drank before I was 21 (ooooh, so illegal!!).
[ .243. ] Kissed someone of the same sex: No
[ .244. ] Gone on a road trip: Yeah, a couple
[ .245. ] Gone on vacation without adult supervision: Yeah, most notably to A-Kon this year
[ .246. ] Been to a concert: Yeah, Tool and Judas Priest
[ .247. ] Been to another country: No, unfortunately
[ .248. ] Talked back to an adult: Yeah
[ .249. ] Got pulled over: Once, when I was learning to drive!
[ .250. ] Got in a car accident: Sort of. A lady ran over my foot.
[ .251. ] Broke a law: Who hasn't?
[ .252. ] Given money to a homeless person: No. I've given them food, though.
[ .253. ] Tried to kill yourself: No
[ .254. ] Cried to get out of trouble: Yeah
[ .255. ] Kissed a friend's brother or sister: No
[ .256. ] Kissed a brother or sister's friend: No
[ .257. ] Dropped something on the floor that you were cooking and let someone eat it anyways?: Five second rule!
[ .258. ] Stood someone up? Nope
[ .259. ] Cheated on a test in school? Not that I remember.
[ .260. ] Cut a class at school? Yeah, in college. You know, where they're not watching your every move.
[ .261. ] Gotten in a fist fight? Yeah, in grade school. Kicked the guy's ass, too.
[ .262. ] Do you steal from work? Nope
[ .263. ] Ever movie jumped? (seen an extra movie or two): Nope
[ .264. ] Ever worn the underwear of someone of the opposite sex or had yours worn? Nope. (My fiance and I can't fit into eachother's underwear, but I do own a pair of boxers.)
[ .265. ] Ever lied to a loved one? Yeah, my parents
[ .266. ] Plagiarized anything? No
[ .267. ] Purposely caused a car accident? No way
[ .268. ] Written on school property? No
[ .269. ] Used a hair coloring product? Yep
[ .270. ] Ever dyed hair on parts of your body other than your head colors not found in nature? No
[ .271. ] Ever worn a costume in public for no specific reason? Yeah, to A-Kon
[ .272. ] Ever watched a whole movie in reverse? No
[ .273. ] Have you ever spent more than 8 consecutive hours online? Yeah, on IRC.

0 P I N I 0 N S
[ .283. ] What do you think...about pop music: I don't really care about it.
[ .284. ] About boy bands: They're lame, I guess.
[ .285. ] About flag burning: It's freedom of expression.
[ .286. ] Of the war on terrorists: Our government has done a fine job of fucking it up.
[ .287. ] About suicide: Um, it's painless?
[ .288. ] About people who try to force their opinions on you: Keep your religion to yourself.
[ .289. ] About abortion: I don't like it, but I think everyone should have the right to choose.
[ .290. ] Reality tv: Boring.
[ .291. ] Jerry Springer: Never seen it.
[ .292. ] Michael jackson: Eh.
[ .293. ] Crisis in Hollwood: What crisis? Looks like a bunch of whiners to me.
[ .294. ] About rock/metal music: It's pretty cool.
[ .295. ] Where do you think you'll be in 10 years: No fuckin' idea.
[ .296. ] Who do you think you'll still be friends with in 5 years: See previous answer.

W H A T D I D Y 0 D 0
[ .297. ] Last birthday: Relaxed, spend the day with my fiance.
[ .299. ] Last weekend: Played D&D.
[ .300. ] Christmas: Went to San Fransisco with my mom.
[ .301. ] Thanksgiving: Made General Tso's chicken and potstickers.
[ .302. ] New year's: Nothing special. Stayed up all night.
[ .303. ] Halloween: Dressed up as a pimp, decorated apartment, handed out candy to the neighborhood kids.
[ .304. ] Easter: I think we went to visit my fiance's parents. I distinctly remember sitting through church.

T H E L A S T
[ .305. ] Thing you ate: Brownie
[ .306. ] Thing you drank: Iced tea
[ .307. ] Thing you wore: Bra and underwear
[ .308. ] Place you went: Alamo Drafthouse
[ .309. ] Thing you got pierced/tattooed: Ears
[ .310. ] Person you saw: My fiance, and earlier today his family
[ .311. ] Person you kissed: Fiance
[ .312. ] Person you fucked: Fiance
[ .313. ] Person you talked to: Fiance
[ .314. ] Song you heard: Blue Oyster Cult - Veteran of the Psychic Wars
[ .315. ] What are you eating: I'll have scrambled eggs in a little while
[ .316. ] What are you drinking: Nothing
[ .317. ] What are you wearing: Bra and underwear
[ .318. ] What do you wish you were wearing: A wifebeater (man's undershirt)
[ .319. ] Any shoes on: Nope
[ .320. ] Hat: I have an Evangelion hat
[ .321. ] Listening to: Fiance watching something in the living room
[ .322. ] Talking to anyone: Not right now
[ .323. ] Are you pissed I made this so long: Eh.

Y or N
[ .324. ] Are you a vegetarian: No, but I like soy, tofu, and Gazpacho soup.
[ .325. ] Do you like cows: Not really.
[ .326. ] Are you a bitch: Yes
[ .327. ] Are you artistic: Not really
[ .328. ] Do you write poetry: A long time ago
[ .329. ] Are you a fast runner: No
[ .330. ] Can you ski: No
[ .331. ] Are you British: No, mate
[ .332. ] Do you want to spear britney: I really don't care about her.
[ .333. ] Do the voices talk to you: Sometimes
[ .334. ] Did you ever give barbie a haircut: Yeah...unfortunately the hair didn't grow back.
[ .335. ] Would you eat mac & cheese with hot dogs in it: That sounds good.
[ .336. ] Do you think disney creators were on acid when they made 'alice in wonderland': Actually I'd venture to say that Lewis Carroll was the one on acid. :P
[ .337. ] Are you straight: Yes
[ .338. ] Are you stupid, insane, or other physically handicapped: What the hell kind of question is that?
[ .339. ] Are you nice: Sometimes
[ .340. ] Are you naughty: Sometimes
[ .341. ] Are you short: Very (4'11)
[ .342. ] Are you tall: Um, no.
[ .343. ] Do you own a hot pink shirt: No
[ .344. ] How about orange pants: Ick
[ .345. ] Can you see the flying monkeys: Yes, they're flinging shit at eachother.
[ .346. ] Are you evil: Yes I fucking am.
[ .347. ] Did you ever know someone who had a mullet: A couple people.
[ .348. ] Is britney a whore: I guess.
[ .349. ] Are you a teenage zombie: I was a teenage werewolf.
[ .350. ] Am i annoying you?: Yes.
[ .351. ] Do you like marilyn manson: He's pretty cool. I like shock rock.
[ .352. ] Are you secretly from another planet: Don't worry, I come in peace.
[ .353. ] Did you ever touch someone else's private parts: another trick question? Yes, I have had sex before.
[ .354. ] This is over are you happy now hahaha: Bite me.

Scam, scam, scam

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 23:01:18 GMT

I had my first scam interview yesterday. Apparently these are pretty common because my fiance attended one last year while he was looking for a job. The company I was asked to interview for was Global Solutions, but it turns out that the actual company is called Liquidity International, and Global Solutions is the name of their Austin office.

Last week, I had spoken with a woman named Theresa over the phone. She set up an appointment and gave me directions. I was expecting a short, 30 minute one-on-one interview, and boy was I suprised. I arrived a little before 1pm and was asked to sign in and give my phone number. While waiting for Theresa, more people start showing up and signing in. After waiting a few minutes, we were all led into a small conference room; everyone seemed just as confused as me. We met some of the company recruiters, including Theresa, and the lady who would be conducting the seminar (I think her name was Heather). She explains that she's going to talk to all of us about the company and show a video. This is where the scam alarm starting going off inside my head.

Heather started with a long, drawn-out spiel about the company's history, how it works, and a full biography of its founder, complete with colorful graphs. She also emphasized how the health industry was booming and was expected to reach a trillion dollars (or some ridiculous amount) per year within the next 5 years. She also rattled off some completely bogus health statistics. Then came a 15-minute sales pitch about each one of the products. First, there was some kind of cream that was supposed to burn off fat and block carbs. Then there was a skin care set retailing at about $160, which she assured us was much, much cheaper and better quality than Clinique or spa brands. At this point, it was hard to keep a straight face. Next she showed us what looked like a bottle full of soy sauce and told us that this miraculous product had vitamins, aloe juice, and noni juice in it and lots of anti-oxidants. She kept repeating that it heals "from the inside," which still doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I figure if you ingest it, it sure as hell better work "from the inside". Lastly she showed us a bottle of pills which apparently was the juice in pill form. I gotta admit, it was interesting to see someone use pseudo-science to hype worthless, untested products. Then came the "dazzle-them-with-dollar-signs" routine. Heather told us that you would make $500 in your first month as a distributor, and that you get nifty bonuses for moving more product and signing more people on. You also get a percentage of the profit from people under you. But it gets better.

What happened next really made my scam alert go crazy. She showed a video full of distributors with amazing success stories. I know I should've walked out then and there, but I was curious. The disclaimer on the video read something like, "Products not intended for medical use. Please consult a doctor before using." As if that wasn't enough, another disclaimer flashed on the screen. "These employees represent the top 1%. The average distributor makes less than $100 per month." I am not kidding. I actually read it twice because I thought I misread it the first time. What followed were happy, smiling employees who talked about how rich they were and how great the products were; one woman even claimed that the soy sauce juice completely cured her migranes. After the video, Heather said that we would take a short break and anyone who wasn't interested could just slip out of the room. As soon as those lights went on, me and two other people ran like bats out of hell.

The good news was that I had enough common sense to get out of there, and I had a legitimate interview at 3pm that went very well. The thing that baffled me the most was that the company seemed to target college students. I found the job listing, which had no mention of seminars or even the company's products, on the UT job website. I suppose the company thinks that college students lack enough real-world experience to know a scam when they see it. They are wrong. Most of the people I knew in college had enough common sense to realize that peddling bogus health products may not help you score that much-coveted extra cash. Despite this, lots of people are drawn into scams because they lack common sense, or because they are simply desperate for a decent job. You'd be amazed what people will make themselves believe if you flash enough dollar signs in front of them. Based on my experience and my fiance's, I've come up with some telltale signs of the scam interview.

1)The interview is a seminar, not a one-on-one. Also, the recruiter gives the impression that the interview will be one-on-one.

2)The presenter gives an in-depth description of the company's products, history, and founder before mentioning any job specifics.

3)The presenter constantly brings up profit, the industry's growth, and generally mentions a lot of big numbers. Also, if the presenter emphasizes the fact that you can make big money with little time or effort. To me, this is the most suspicious behavior of all.

4)The company's products are untested and make outrageous claims; therefore the presenter will use a lot of pseudo-science or newage in his/her sales pitch.

5)There is a video of several wealthy, successful employees who claim to have quit their old jobs/experienced a medical miracle because of said company and its products.

6)If there is any kind of start-up or training fee. Luckily I didn't get to this stage, but this is prevalent in scams of any kind.

7)Any mention of MLM (Multi-Level Marketing), a legal pyramid scheme. It emphasizes recruiting others and gaining a share of their profit. Go here for more info.

8)If it seems too good to be true, it usually is.

Super random update!

Thu, 01 Sep 2005 23:11:24 GMT

Ugh, I really should be updating my crappy Japanese journal, eiennihongo, but I've been so lazy lately. I need to keep up my Japanese skills, though. Chances are I'll be getting a job/internship in marketing or sales, so I need to go to extra lengths to avoid forgetting that thing I got my degree in. ;) I'm not too upset about not immediately landing a translating job; a bunch of them wanted additional stuff like QA or marketing experience. A few companies said I just need more practice, which is fine. Actually, I think translating Black Lagoon is really helping me work with more adult material and better understand nuances.

Also, I recently tried chocolate soy milk (or "soy juice," to quote Lewis Black). For something that didn't come out of a cow's udder, it's actually quite good, although a little chalky. Why did I try it? One word: cramps. I read somewhere that soy is supposed to help alleviate menstrual cramps, and amazingly, it worked like a charm. I only had to take one Aleve during my whole period. Hurray for tasty natural remedies. :)

Speaking of tasty, I've got another cheap recipe to share. This one is modified from the Betty Crocker cookbook (1983 ed). By the way, the older Betty Crocker cookbooks fucking rule. Mine has everything from Gazpacho to Sukiyaki. I highly recommend picking one of these up if you enjoy cooking and simple, thrifty recipes.

Tuna Cakes

Ingredients:
2 slices white bread, crusts removed
1 can (6 1/2 oz) tuna, drained
1 egg
1 tsp Worcestershire sauce
1/2 tsp dry mustard
1/4 tsp salt
1 tbsp olive oil

Dill Sauce
1/8 cup mayonnaise
1/8 tsp dried dill weed

Directions:
Mix bread, tuna, egg, Worcestershire sauce, dry mustard, and salt. Shape mixture into 3 patties, each about 1/2 inch thick. Fry in olive oil over medium heat until golden brown on both sides (about 5 minutes/side). Top with Dill Sauce. Also, I recommend using Starkist tuna in olive oil or water. Water is a little healthier, but olive oil has lots of flavor. This recipe is wonderful for a light dinner for two.

My fiance downloaded her book How to Talk to a Liberal (if You Must), possibly just to make his blood pressure soar to new heights, and I realized something about all these Goddamn mudslinging, talking-head pundits. I don't even think that they believe the crap that they're spewing out; they're just doing it for the cash and attention. Case in point: Ann Coulter gave a talk at UT last semester (sadly, I did not attend), and it was a Huge Fucking Deal. There were protesters, angry mobs, etc. Everyone was talking about her. And to think that the seminar I attended (the speaker was a very famous Japanese linguist) got no publicity. I think that punditry displays many of the characteristics of pro wrestling, the difference being that wrestlers will admit what they do is fake. Political pundits just want attention and money, and are not above name-calling and twisting facts to get it. I should also note that I have no love for Al Franken either; his books tend to be a little bit funnier, but are none the less sanctimonious bullshit. I just don't understand why these people get any attention. Is TV so lacking in pointless crap?

Ah yes, and my fiance was fine; after about 20 minutes he listened to some George Carlin and his blood pressure went back down to normal.

I have insomnia

Sat, 20 Aug 2005 11:16:22 GMT

So I decided to do something fun and post a random survey thing in my journal. Below is a list of IMDB's top 100 films. I actually ganked this from some random journal, but you can find it in its unmodified form at ObeyTheFist.com. Also, this is not the AFI, but the IMDB, so remember most popular doesn't always mean best. For instant, Toy Story 2 is at #96, and the three LOTR films ranked above Citizen Kane, Star Wars, and Schindler's List. I've put an lj-cut after the first 20 to avoid blowing up my f-list.

1 Godfather, The (1972) Never seen it
2 Shawshank Redemption, The (1994) Favorite
3 Godfather: Part II, The (1974) Never seen it
4 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, The (2003) Finished it
5 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, The (2002) Finished tt
6 Casablanca (1942) Never seen it
7 Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, The (2001) Finished it
8 Schindler's List (1993) Favorite
9 Shichinin No Samurai [Seven Samurai] (1954) Started it
10 Star Wars (1977) Finished it
11 Citizen Kane (1941) Never seen it
12 One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975) Finished it, Excellent
13 Dr. Strangelove (1964) Own it/favorite
14 Rear Window (1954) Never seen it
15 Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) Finished it
16 Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) Finished it, used to own it
17 Memento (2000) Never seen it
18 Usual Suspects, The (1995) Never seen it
19 Pulp Fiction (1994) Own it
20 North by Northwest (1959) Never seen it

21 12 Angry Men (1957) Finished it, Excellent
22 Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain, Le [Amelie] (2001) Never seen it
23 Psycho (1960) Finished it, Love it
24 Lawrence of Arabia (1962) Never seen it
25 The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (1966) Never seen it (I hate westerns)
26 Silence of the Lambs, The (1991) Favorite
27 It's a Wonderful Life (1946) Hated it. Cheesy and overhyped.
28 Goodfellas (1990) Never seen it
29 American Beauty (1999) Finished it, Excellent
30 Vertigo (1958) Never seen it
31 Sunset Blvd. (1950) Never seen it
32 Matrix, The (1999) Finished it. Decent, I guess.
33 Apocalypse Now (1979) Never seen it
34 Pianist, The (2002) Never seen it
35 To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) Finished it
36 Once Upon a Time in the West (1968) Never seen it
37 Some Like It Hot (1959) Never seen it
38 Third Man, The (1949) Never seen it
39 Taxi Driver (1976) Finished it, Excellent.
40 Paths of Glory (1957) Finished It, Excellent. I love Stanley Kubrick.
41 Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi [Spirited Away] (2001) Favorite
42 Fight Club (1999) Favorite, Own it
43 Boot, Das (1981) Never seen it
44 Double Indemnity (1944) Never seen it
45 L.A. Confidential (1997) Never seen it
46 Chinatown (1974) Never seen it
47 Singin' in the Rain (1952) Never seen it
48 Maltese Falcon, The (1941) Never seen it
49 M (1931) Never seen it
50 Requiem for a Dream (2000) Never seen it (I have seen Pi, though.)
51 Bridge on the River Kwai, The (1957) Finished it
52 All About Eve (1950) Never seen it
53 Se7en (1995) Finished it, Disturbing and good
54 Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975) Favorite, Own it
55 Saving Private Ryan (1998) Started it, found it very boring
56 Cidade de Deus [City of God] (2002) Never seen it
57 Raging Bull (1980) Never seen it
58 Rashômon (1950) Started it
59 Wizard of Oz, The (1939) Hated it! Lame songs, boring plot, and lame songs.
60 Sting, The (1973) Never seen it
61 Alien (1979) Finished it
62 American History X (1998) Never seen it
63 Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939) Never seen it
64 Professional, The (1994) Finished it, Excellent
65 Vita è bella, La [Life is Beautiful] (1997) Finished it, Excellent (Actually made me cry)
66 Touch of Evil (1958) Never seen it
67 Manchurian Candidate, The (1962) Never seen it
68 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) Own it
69 Treasure of the Sierra Madre, The (1948) Never seen it
70 Great Escape, The (1963) Never seen it
71 Wo hu cang long [Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon] (2000) Finished it, pretty good, but lots of wire-fu
72 Reservoir Dogs (1992) Own it, Excellent
73 Clockwork Orange, A (1971) Favorite, Own it, Love it
74 Amadeus (1984) Never seen it
75 Modern Times (1936) Never seen it
76 Ran (1985) Finished it, Excellent but LONG
77 Annie Hall (1977) Never seen it
78 Jaws (1975) Finished it
79 On the Waterfront (1954) Never seen it
80 Braveheart (1995) Never seen it
81 High Noon (1952) Never seen it
82 Apartment, The (1960) Never seen it
83 Fargo (1996) Started it
84 Sixth Sense, The (1999) Never seen it
85 Aliens (1986) Finished it
86 Shining, The (1980) Finished it
87 Strangers on a Train (1951) Never seen it
88 Blade Runner (1982) Favorite, Own it, Love it
89 Metropolis (1927) Started it
90 Duck Soup (1933) Own it (I love the Marx Brothers!)
91 Finding Nemo (2003) Hated it! (I don't like kids' movies.)
92 Donnie Darko (2001) Finished it, Excellent
93 General, The (1927) Never seen it
94 City Lights (1931) Never seen it
95 Princess Bride, The (1987) Finished it, Really Good
96 Toy Story 2 (1999) Never seen it
97 Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003) Finished it
98 Great Dictator, The (1940) Never seen it
99 Sjunde inseglet, Det [The Seventh Seal] (1957) Never seen it
100 Lola rennt [Run Lola Run] (1998) Never seen it

Maybe I'll post this weekend when I have something interesting to say in non-list form.

"Jesus loves you," supernatural bullshit, the Beach type of magic

Tue, 09 Aug 2005 01:32:58 GMT

To start with, an interesting flier appeared at my door a few weeks ago. It was for some local pizza place, but what really struck me was this:

Click on the image to see more of the ad.

"Jesus loves you"? WTF? Not only is it in a pizza ad, it's right in the middle of the address! My fiance and I both got a good laugh out of this wildly out-of-place religious sentiment.

Which reminds me, a post on childfree about the infamous Jack Chick tracts got me to thinking: the expression "God/Jesus's free gift of love/salvation" really bothers me. It's just creepy: it makes salvation sound like signing up with Columbia House. "Act now and receive the gift of God's love for just pennies a day! Operators are standing by!" But then again, I'm an asshole. I don't believe in angels, demons, or possession. (For the record, I also don't believe in goblins, vampires, and zombies.) These fantastical creatures make for great stories, but I really think they're just figments of the imagination. You know, when D&D players pretend to cast spells and fight the undead, people accuse them of not being able to separate fantasy from reality. These same people believe in demonic possession and freaking guardian angels. Pot, meet kettle.

On that tangent, I think people need fantasy, the unknown. Humanity has been obsessed with spirits and supernatural forces since its inception. Why should we stop now? It's fun to imagine having an all-knowing, unseen creator that watches over you and has all the answers. It's fun to dream about being abducted by aliens and telling everyone about your experience. It's fun to think you've seen a ghost, have a guardian angel, or even that you can do magic. It makes you feel special, and in the case of religion, it helps you cope with events you can't explain or control. I swear, I feel myself sliding closer and closer toward Atheism simply because I don't care a whole lot for supernatural bullshit.

In addition to Emerald Dragon and Black Lagoon, I'm now working on a game called Ancient Magic for Gideon Zhi. The only problem is that it's almost entirely in kana. (I think there's roughly 5 kanji in the whole game.) Now, some of you might think this makes translating the game easier. It does not. For instance, a few days ago I was trying to translate the types of magic in the game, one of which is はま. So I go to Jeffrey's Japanese-English dictionary, which has most common words (and some uncommon ones). Lo and behold, the only はま I see is 浜 (beach). So I think, "Great, it's the Beach type of magic. Maybe it lets you summon surfboards or something." :P Of course, when I looked in the Goo Dictionary, I found another word with the reading はま, 破魔. So I'm thinking of going with "Exorcism" or something similar. As you can see from this example of my ineptness as a translator, kanji is always your friend.

A-Kon and foot pics, translation projects

Sun, 10 Jul 2005 08:41:18 GMT

First of all:

I just had to get that out of the way. The damage doesn't look too bad in the pictures, but you can see how swollen it was. It's much better now. (I can finally play DDR again!! I am SO hitting the arcade next week!) Also, here's me and my fiance at A-Kon 2005 (I'm Edward Elric again):

I want to go as a different character next year, but it's hard to find someone I can concievably cosplay. Edward is perfect (except for the hair) because he's short and his outfit is amazingly simple.

I start work on Black Lagoon next week! I'm so excited! No more Pretty Face! I'm gonna miss Elkhan, though. He's a great editor, and a nice guy (because he puts up with all my anal-retentive shit). Oh, an in other news, Loztcause disappeared from Akatsuki, leaving only a whiny livejournal and a cryptic farewell message. I'm kinda happy he's gone, actually; he may have been a good editor, but he was a serious fuckin' asshole. I hope he has a nice life and gets a Goddamn education. Anyway, I've decided to finish Emerald Dragon. I put it a lot of hard work on this project, and I'm not gonna let the other translator screw it up. I don't know who was working on this project before me, but his translations needed some serious revision. I still can't figure out why he used "Demon Army" in some blocks but "MAGUN" (the original word is 魔軍) in others. I mean, sweet zombie Jesus, have a little consistency. The fact that he just did pieces of blocks (I know that doesn't make a lot of sense) instead of whole blocks doesn't help either. I know I sound arrogant about this, but I didn't do all this work on the script just to see someone butcher the rest of it.

In other news, I think my scanner's fucked up. It's pretty damn old, but when I was scanning the pictures, there was some color distortion. I know scanners are cheap, but right now not free = too expensive. :P Tomorrow Dan's parents are taking us to Schlitterbahn (huge waterpark), so that'll be fun. I've also got to finish my Namco translator test by Monday. Man, I want that job so bad I can taste it. I'm also going to do a translator test for a yaoi manga company in Houston. It's right up my alley: translating porn and getting paid for it. That's pretty much the same thing I do at Akatsuki, except it's less like porn, more like ecchi. ^^

McNews

Sat, 18 Jun 2005 07:49:50 GMT

I don't even really watch TV anymore. In fact, our TV only gets three channels: FOX, PBS, and some crappy religious channel. Oh, and we get another channel. I think it's NBC or maybe CBS, but I never watch it because there's nothing good on. I watch FOX for Seinfeld, the Simpsons, and such; PBS for their wonderful but narrow selection of Britcoms; and the crazy religious channel to get a good laugh. But I almost never watch the local news. I find it patronizing and boring, a real waste of time. But recently I happened to see a story about how the people of Hawaii were adopting their own version of the Japanese Obon festival. The piece lasted, oh, about 30 seconds, and didn't tell anything about the festival except to hint that it was quaint and adorable. My problem with this is that if you're going to spend less than a minute on a story and not tell anything interesting about it at all, then why bother even reporting on it? Come on, I'm sure there are lots of homicides and car crashes (complete with gory footage) that would be better for ratings. Or you could just have an extra 30 seconds for sports. No harm done there. :P

Call me a snob if you want, but I'd much rather watch that thing on PBS with Jim Lehrer. I watched the one where he had Henry Kissinger on and they talked about foreign policy; it was interesting. I mean, there weren't any pretty graphics of smiling suns ("Why would a dying star be smiling?!") or people getting gunned down halfway across the world, so I had a hard time paying attention, but I actually got something out of it. My halfway point is the Daily Show; it's snappy, sarcastic, crude humor combined with funny graphics and goofy human interest stories. It's a stylish, biting mockery of the six o'clock McNews. My two personal favorite segments are "Produce Pete" and "This Week in God," although "International Pamphlet" is funny, too. I'll take it over McNews any day.

BTW, a cookie for anyone who can tell me where the "dying star" quote is from (except my fiance, because he watched it with me).

Foot injury/A-Kon 2005/"You Might be an Otaku if..."

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 19:40:10 GMT

Yeesh, my foot got run over two days before A-Kon. There I was, walking to the library, minding my own business, when a woman in a huge black truck pulls out in front of me and runs over my foot! (I had a walk sign AND right-of-way as a pedestrian.) The bitch that hit me left the scene of the accident without giving me any of her information after I told her my foot was injured, but luckily there was a police officer nearby and she was promptly arrested. ^^ The good news is that my foot's not broken or sprained, I just have a really bad contusion. So basically I get to take painkillers and walk on crutches for two weeks. For some reason I'm tempted to post gross pictures of my injured foot in a later entry.

I did go to A-Kon, though. I dressed up as Edward Elric again; this time I discovered that I look really stupid in a blond wig. Not telling my mother I was going to A-Kon really paid off, though. Last year she threw a shitfit because I didn't spend a lot of time with her, despite the fact that I told her that we were coming to Euless specifically for A-Kon. This year Dan and I went with Merle instead and split the cost of a hotel room. We stayed at this cheap Motel 6 in Euless (it came to about $33/person). I didn't buy too much in the way of souvenirs (two keychains and some laminated cards), but I watched a ton of anime. I saw Five Star Stories, Mermaid Forest, an episode of Giant Robo, the new Appleseed movie, the first season of Red vs. Blue, and Lupin III: In Memory of Walther P38. I wish I could've seen the cosplay, but Dan's work buddy (who's plan was to "just meet up somewhere" and watch it on the TV in his suite) never got in contact with us. I'd like to see a cosplay just once, but it's not worth standing in the main lobby with like 500 screaming people blocking my view. That was the only other thing that bugged me: every time I'd sit down to watch something, some big-headed asshole always sat in front of me. It's hard to change your seat when you're restricted to crutches, but it's a lot harder to see the subtitles over someone's head.

In the spirit of this anime-themed entry, I've decided to post something funny I found on Blogthings.com. The list is in blue, my smartass responses are in black italics.

You Know You're Addicted to Anime When...

You call your dog Shinji.

I do have a rat named Ranze. Shinji is way too obvious, though. :P

Your house has an anime room.

Yeah, it's called my living room.

You and your friends flash peace signs and take girlish poses when you are happy.

The Edward Elric pics are proof of this...

Your walls are covered in wallscrolls and posters from your favorite series.

*Ahem* I do have Cowboy Bebop posters everywhere...

If you use the term 'kawaii' for describing everything.

Actually I prefer kakkoii or sometimes sugoi.

You can sing songs from your favorite shows, in Japanese, even though you dont speak Japanese...

*Sings* Kimi wo kimi wo aishiteiru! Kokoro de mitsumeteiru...

You spent hours looking through your library for a copy of "The Universe of Four Gods"

Sadly I'm not a big fan of Yuu Watase.

You insist on having an entrance that includes spotlights, music, and raining cherry blossoms (while you hold a rose if you're a guy).

I dunno, I think I'd rather have theme music like Peter Griffin.

You watch Iron Chef constanly to pick up great recipes

I love the squid battle episode!

You think that falling flat on your back with your legs in the air is a normal reaction to big news.

*Coughs nervously*

You are worried because you don't have several desirable members of the opposite sex frantically trying to make you fall in love with them.

Ya know I've met guys like that; the strange thing is that they're not usually into anime.

You waste countless amounts of hair gel to get that "Goku look"

Yes, because all anime fans want to look like Goku. He could kick anyone's ass, don't ya know?

You map out points in Tokyo where the Dragons of Earth might attack

Better start with Tokyo Tower...

You believe it is possible for a person to be severly beaten in the head with a large hammer, stick, etc...and still come out alive.

As does anyone who grew up watching Looney Tunes.

You have a moment of confusion whenever you go to school because there are no girls in those tiny little skirts that come with their school uniform

There were girls in tiny little skirts at my high school, but I don't think they were anime fans.

You tell your parents you need to stay out past curfew to save the colonies.

"But dad, Zeon could invade at any second!"

You add "no da" to the end of all statements you make

From my experiences, this is actually frighteningly common with Japanese speakers. I'm more prone to "ne" myself.

You misplace your manga and someone at school you don't even know gives it to you saying they knew it was yours.

I can just see it now:
"Hey, is this your Star Ocean Ashton x Dias yaoi doujinshi?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"Just a guess."

You incorporate Japanese, somehow, into every class.

It didn't help that most of my classes were Asian Studies.

You try to read every book from right to left

I blame this one on the fact that I translate manga.

You take a break from watching anime to go to your computer (nicknamed Lord Canti) to download anime (for previewing purposes only! ;) ), while visiting your favorite anime forum, while listening to Japanese webradio...

Okay, that just sounds creepy and obsessive. Cute FLCL reference, though.

You say ITADAKIMASU!! before you eat your meals

Only on special occasions. Besides, is it really that strange? No one has a problem with "Bon appetit."

You insist on chopsticks for everyday use.

*Imagines some poor shmuck trying to eat a burger with chopsticks.*

Your bookshelf is filled with anime boxed sets and no books

Mine is filled with 1/2 manga, 1/2 books. I usually don't buy boxed sets unless they're super cheap.

You stop listening to the radio because english makes no sense to you anymore and it's your first spoken language

"何？ああ！！もう英語わかんないよ！"

Random battles seem to erupt wherever you go.

That means you need to move to a better neighborhood.

Your dreams are animated.

*Sigh* Guilty as charged.

You naru punch all the guys at school, and then wonder why they don't follow you around like keitaro follows naru.

God I fucking hate Love Hina. I know that wasn't funny; I just really, really hate Love Hina.

You hold your eyes really wide all day trying to make them stay big

Because you are a dumbass.

When you're washing dishes you yell out "SUPAH WAVE SMASHUH!" or any water attack.

Man, what an obscure reference. I wonder how many people got that one?

You run out of space on your computer because the hard drive is taken up by hundreds of anime pics, mp3s, midis, and music videos.

It's not my fault. My laptop has a small hard drive.

You spend your whole spring break working on an anime webpage.

Or you spend an hour or so making fun of this list on your LJ.

You expect to see a teardrop over someone's head when they get embarrassed.

Yeah, kinda...

You start to speak with an odd accent.

That I blame mainly on the fact that I watch lots of Britcoms.

You know your favorite character's bloodtype.

I don't even know my own bloodtype.

After graduation

Sun, 29 May 2005 07:33:49 GMT

Well, I finally graduated with my BA in Japanese. Now on to finding a job. Yay. I've put in applications at a few places, and I posted on MO's Board asking for advice from some of the seasoned translators there. Specifically Tomato, who (last I knew) works for Funmation. Most of the people on the board are either students or freelance translators, so I figured they might have some good tips for me.

In other news, my rat Ranze (who recently had a tumor removed) is well on the road to recovery. She had her staples taken out last week and is doing fine, but the only problem is that I have to keep their cage super-clean so her wound doesn't get infected. This means I have to completely clean the cage out once a day and change the rags they've been using for bedding. As long as it helps my little rattie recover, though, I don't mind. ^^ Also, I will be attending A-Kon this year because my fiance agreed to pay for our hotel room and tickets as my graduation gift. I'm going as Edward Elric again, and this time I'll be wearing a wig! I'll post a picture or two afterwards.

I'm still not totally finished with Pretty Face like I hoped to be, but at least I'll be finished with the final chapter before I go to A-Kon. Then all I have to do is the two omake (the typical "hot springs trip" scenario) chapters and PF will be finished. I'm also working on Emerald Dragon on account of Nightcrawler's main translator pulling out of the project. That dude made a total mess of the script, too. It's arranged in tiny little chunks of text, and instead of just doing them sequentially, he tried to put them in the order in which they occur in the game. This may sound like a good idea, but trust me, it's really not. Those chunks need to be kept in order so they can be inserted properly. What's even worse is that it looks like he started at the end of the text chunks, not the beginning, so all the work he did is pretty much useless to me. I mean, maybe if I somehow end up doing the whole game his work will come in handy, but that's not bloody likely.

I'm going to see a nutritionist on Tuesday. I finally complained to the university doctor that my BC pills are making my body go funhouse mirror. I've gained about 50 lbs since I started taking them 3 years ago, and I've tried changing my diet and exercising more, but nothing seems to work. I've heard from lots of women that BC pills can seriously screw with your weight, so the doctor tried to help by putting me on a brand that won't cause weight gain (I hope). She also suggested that I go see a nutritionist, and it's free, so I figure what the hell. Personally I don't think this nutritionist will really help me, but I guess it's worth a shot. I hate gaining all this damn weight, and I certainly don't want to fall victim to the weight and heart problems that run rampant on my mom's side of the family, but if it's a choice between excess weight and acne, I'll take the weight. I don't want a repeat of the terrible acne I had in high school.

I am teh smart!

Tue, 10 May 2005 05:05:47 GMT

I stole this neat quiz from a random journal. It's supposed to test your grasp of the English language. I think I did pretty well. ^^

English Genius
You scored 100% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 93% Advanced, and 100% Expert!

You did so extremely well, even I can't find a word to describe your excellence! You have the uncommon intelligence necessary to understand things that most people don't. You have an extensive vocabulary, and you're not afraid to use it properly! Way to go!

Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!

For the complete Answer Key, visit my blog: http://shortredhead78.blogspot.com/.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 71% on Beginner

You scored higher than 65% on Intermediate

You scored higher than 52% on Advanced

You scored higher than 98% on Expert

Link: The Commonly Confused Words Test written by shortredhead78 on Ok Cupid

I've had a really hard time dealing with final exams, my job hunt, and writing my huge Japanese Lit paper. I CAN'T WAIT for finals to be over. No more school for me!! I'm not going to commencement because I heard from a friend who graduated last semester that it totally sucked. If it was anything like high school graduation, I'll pass. My family and Dan's are going to have a nice dinner at Musashino's together, though, and he and I will probably have a separate celebration with a few of our friends. I've never been one for formal ceremonies anyway; they always bore the shit out of me.

I'm so happy I'm graduating from college. I really enjoyed my 4 years at UT, but school gets a little tiring after 17 straight years, ya know? Part of me wishes I could go to grad school, but I'm so fed up with research and tests and projects and studying and due dates. And I want money. Oh, God do I want money. Happy will be the day when I don't have to live off my parents and I have a wallet full of disposable income!

Fuck you, foulmouthedb!

Thu, 21 Apr 2005 15:21:17 GMT

Usually I agree with most of the stuff on childfree. Okay, so there are the occasional posts along the lines of "Pregnant women should just suck it up instead of whining!" and "All children should be kept at home until they're 18!" that I don't always agree with, but hey, they're appropriate subject matter for the community, and everyone is entitled to their opinion.

This post, however, is somewhat different. It's someone whining incessantly about how the new German pope sucks and how lukewarm Catholics are all hypocrites and "chickenshits." I have a special hatred for this idiot because my fiance happens to be one of those "chickenshit" Catholics. First of all, it's really great to see someone who obviously doesn't understand that religion isn't static, but changes over time trying to explicitly define what constitutes a good Catholic. Way to tell others how to practice their religion, pal. I really think she missed the logic train on this one: there's a clear difference between hypocrisy and thinking for yourself. I agree that there are lots of hypocritical Catholics out there, and that the Catholic church really needs to change its stance on things, but people of all religions and all walks of life are hypocritical in some way; why single out Catholics? Oh, that's right, because they're an easy target.

Second, and most importantly, what the fuck does this have to do with being childfree? This is clearly an argument about religion that doesn't pertain to the community except for the fact that the Catholic church has always been anti-birth control. But really, this dumb bitch is using that as a flimsy pretext to do some serious Catholic-bashing. Save it for your journal, sweetie. Lastly, I'm not even going to comment on that Confederate flag she's got as her icon: I preffer to leave symbols for the symbol-minded.

An innocent stripper / Better be good to me

Sat, 16 Apr 2005 16:40:55 GMT

I went to go see Sin City about a week ago. It was really good, not absolutely brilliant, but nice and violent. (That's the way I like 'em.) I liked Marv the best because he was such a freakin' badass. The one character that kind of bugged me was Nancy (the "innocent stripper"). It was like Miller (who did the original comics) tried to make Nancy complex and three-dimensional by making her both a stripper and an innocent little girl (sort of how Tanizaki's Aguri is both beautiful and ugly). It seemed to me that no one is truly innocent in Sin City, and Miller's attempt at mixing girlhood purity and blunt sexuality was something straight out of a cheap romance novel. It's almost like he was beating the reader over the head with her sexuality, when she's really nothing more than a tease. By having her work as a stripper, it's like Miller is saying, "Okay, okay, she's totally sexy, but she's really an innocent damsel-in-distress who needs to be rescued." I kept thinking, "Why not have her work at a law office or something? Why not give her a normal job?" It's just a lame attempt at trying to needlessly hyper-sexualize her. Also, I particularly enjoyed the castration scene at the end of the film because about half of the guys in the audience went "Gaah!" and covered their crotches. Funny shit. ^^

Well, anyway, my obnoxious neighbors finally moved out! They just up and left and took their Goddamn annoying little brats with them! No more loud music, no more kids scaring my cats, no more grilling on the porch (a big fire hazard), and no more late-night parties! Finally, I get some peace and quiet! Good riddance to those annoying motherfuckers! Honestly, I wish I could live in one of those childfree condos meant for retired people. I know it'd be expensive, but I'd totally love it. I hate kids.

Finally, I emailed Nightcrawler (of Nightcrawler's Translation Corp) to ask if I could help out with Emerald Dragon. I don't wanna do the whole script, but I really enjoy playing this game, and I'd like to see it in English. Unfortunately, he's giving me the runaround about my experience and credentials and stuff. I'm happy to see that he's concerned about quality control, but damn it's irritating. He even wanted me to do a test block of text to see if I've got what it takes. I can see why he hasn't made a whole lot of progress on the game. *Sigh* I swear, everything in the world of romhacking is a long and drawn-out process. I am going to be fucking pissed if he says I'm not qualified: I've been working with roms for four years, have a lot of experience, and I'm getting a BA in Japanese. I know I did well on that test block, and let's face it, he needs another translator. He's in no position to turn me down for something stupid like, "Oh, you missed this word here." Arrogant as this may be, I really don't like it when people call my translating skills into question. I don't mind if it's a legitimate concern (say, if I was asking to help with Radical Dreamers, a much more difficult game), but I don't appreciate a hacker who doubts my skills and takes his sweet time responding, when in fact, he's the one who need MY help. I've had problems with hackers who just don't communicate well, or who expect me to do all the work, and the one thing I have to say to Nightcrawler or any other hacker who wants my assistance is that you better be good to me (that's how it's gotta be now). Don't take this as a personal attack on Nightcrawler or anything; I've never worked with the guy, and he seems nice enough, I just don't like my skills being repeatedly questioned.